Her Way back to Heaven
by Sparrow85
Summary: SEQUEL TO : "HER WAY OUT OF HELL!" The sun slowly began to rise and it poured its liquid bronze over the buildings of New Orleans, Louisiana. The first birds began to sing and some leftover of party goers were stumbling down the street cheering and laughing. And while their night was about to begin, the day began for our lovely couple of two beautiful witches. FOXXAY
1. Chapter 1

**sequel to "her way out of hell" **

**a weekend alone just keeps me updating every single day ;-)**

**enjoy! **

Her way back to heaven

Chapter 1: out of heaven

It was four am on a Monday morning. The sun slowly began to rise and it poured its liquid bronze over the buildings of New Orleans, Louisiana. The first birds began to sing and some leftover of party goers were stumbling down the street cheering and laughing. And while their night was about to begin, the day began for our lovely couple of two beautiful witches.

Misty Day lay on her back in the queen size bed in her apartment. She stared at the little alligators on the walls, knowing their number by heart, for she counted them in so many sleepless nights she had lately when she like know recalled the past nine months of her life. Well, she literally didn't live up to that certain date when she gave in her feelings towards the woman beside her. She heard the same woman shifting now. The rising sun slowly illuminated the room. Misty turned her face to look at her lover and softly smiled at her when she saw her deep brown eyes open. There was some heavy sad vibe upon their love. They both felt it. Both didn't dare to talk about it of fear, they would lit a spark, that would end in a raging fire which would leave all they had in ashes. And both also knew that this situation was close to excruciating.

Misty turned onto her side, bowing her right arm under her head, using it as a pillow.

"Hi" she whispered.

Cordelia didn't respond, just moved closer to her, lifted Misty's duvet and slid under it. She immediately began to place tiny kisses on Misty's bare shoulder. Her fingertips danced her way down Misty's upper body.

Misty groaned in frustration when she gently tried to push the other woman away from her.

"No, I don't want to." She murmured. Cordelia ignored Misty's plea, instead she just got fiercer. Misty soon had enough and pushed Cordelia away from her maybe a bit too roughly.

"Well, you wanted yesterday evening. " Cordelia remarked.

"Yes, n' you didn't and _I_ didn't push you." Misty responded her voice louder than intended.

Cordelia sighed in surrender. She snuggled up to Misty again.

"Will there be a time when we both want it at the same time, again?" Cordelia whispered, her fingertips drawing lazy patterns on Misty's shoulder. Misty shifted then groaned and pushed Cordelia's hand away, scratching the skin of her shoulder afterwards.

"What?" Cordelia asked slightly annoyed.

"Nothing, it's tickling me." She wrapped her right arm around Cordelia's body and pulled her closer. She kissed her hairline and nuzzled her nose into her hair afterwards. "I'm sorry, Lia."

Cordelia smiled. "I don't dare to ask you now but…."

"Well now you made me curious." Misty smiled.

"When will you move in with me?"

Misty sighed and rolled her eyes.

"Do we have to discuss this now?" Misty backed out of Cordelia's grip, got up and put her bathrobe on. She spoke while she knotted the ties together. "I already told you, that I don't want to." She added.

Cordelia sat up straight in bed, with her back against the headboard.

"But why?" Cordelia asked.

Misty shook her head annoyed. "Why do you insist so hard? I did explain it to you. I need my own space. That doesn't mean I don't want to spend time with you, but I would die like a plant if I had nothing on my own. I feel bad enough because you paid for all this." Misty gestured around her. "At least I am now able to pay the rent myself. "

She walked around the bed and sat down on the bedside facing Cordelia.

"I….When you visit me I want to treat you as a guest, you know? I clean up, I cook for you, I fulfil you every wish. I wouldn't be able to do all this if we shared one apartment. Because that would be ours. There'd be no yours nor mine, just ours. That's not what I want. You maintain me enough anyway. Just think of …" she thought for a while, "we would have arguments about the most slightest things. Like how we do our laundry."

Finally Cordelia spoke and she got on her knees when she did to be taller than Misty in her sitting position.

"Yeah, that's because you're persnickety when it comes to your clothes, I don't know anyone but you who turns their clothes to on the left before washing and turn it on the right again before hang them to dry!"

"I am not persnickety; I just think it's a waste of time to fumble with my shirts and jeans in the morning, because they are turned left. Maybe you are so blasé because there was always someone who did your laundry. You don't have the slightest hint of how it is to be alone; there was always someone around you, spoiling you. You need to learn, that I don't need that. I can and I will it do on my own. I don't need you."

Silence. Misty knew right after the second she finished, that she had made a mistake.

"Fine!" was the only thing Cordelia said, before she left the bed. She grabbed her things and ran into the bathroom.

"Fuck!" Misty pinched the bridge of her nose, before the got up and followed her.

"Lia!" she called. She entered the bathroom and watched Cordelia throwing her cosmetics into her bag.

"Don't Lia me! That time is over!"

"What the hell are you doing?" Misty said while Cordelia pushed pass her and left the room. She put her jeans and blouse on.

"You want to be alone? I leave you alone!" She grabbed her jacket and bag and opened the door.

"Don't be late for work!" She gave Misty a look which was a mix of anger, sadness and disappointment before she slammed the door shut behind her.

* * *

Misty hurried down the hallways of Miss Robichaux's, she was late because she missed her bus. Her eyes were still red from the tears she cried earlier and her kajal was smudged under her eyes, her nose a bit runny. She passed some young girls and boys all giving her an empathic look. She entered the classroom and went to her desk without looking at her students. She threw her bag into the corner behind her and sat down. She wiped her nose with the back of her hand, cleared her throat and spoke to her class.

"Page 45 in your books. Solanum nigrum, read, summarize and think of magic power this herb might hold. Time: thirty minutes from now. We will compare your results in the last fifteen minutes."

She opened the botanic book and tried to read the paragraph about the solanum as well , although her ability to concentrate was somehow gone. She only thought of Cordelia and how she looked at her before she left the apartment. She thought of how she herself fell on the bed again and started to cry, how she almost forgot to breathe in because the sobs caused a vacuum in her lungs. She cried until there were no tears anymore and then suddenly realized, that time in fact did go on. She blinked once and rubbed her neck. 'Concentrate!' she reminded herself. There was a sudden shadow rushing through the room. Misty thought it to be a large bird, which flew by the window. She wasn't so sure about this anymore when it happened again and again. She looked up. She heard her own breath loud in her head. There was a sudden buzzing in her ears and the room around her began to spin. She heard familiar words getting louder in her head and her only thought was that this just couldn't be true. Not again…..not again….

"Freak! You're a freak! Mr. Kringley! She did it again!"

Misty grasped both of her temples and tried to breath calmly.

"Miss Day?" Misty suddenly heard a childlike voice beside her. She jumped in surprise and turned towards her.

"Hey, Melissa!"

The young girl put her book down on her teacher's desk and pointed to a certain line.

"I don't understand that. Would you please explain?"

Misty double-checked on her to be sure she was really back in reality.

"Of course!" Misty said and pulled the girl closer so she could explain whatever the girl asked.

She just wanted to forget what just happened.


	2. Chapter 2

**This is going to be a very sweet chapter...enjoy :-)**

Chapter 2: chocolate bars

"How many chocolate bars do want to eat anyway, Delia?" Zoe asked when she heard the noise of wrapping being crumpled for the umpteenth time. She sat across from her supreme in a chair working on her laptop.

"Hopefully I suffer a diabetic coma and die. That would be the best solution."

"You know as well as I do, that this won't happen. Not as long as you're the supreme."

"I'll try anyway."

Zoe shook her head laughing. "Oookaaaayyy!" Zoe quietly mouthed and closed her laptop shut before she stood. She brushed some empty wrappings from the desk and found three chocolate bars left. She took them when Cordelia protested.

"What are you doing?"

"I guess there's another one who needs chocolate as well."

Cordelia shook her head. "She won't eat them." She said and grabbed Zoe's hand which held the chocolate bars. Zoe kneeled down, rested her forearms on the edge of the desk and watched her boss and friend intently. Cordelia suddenly pretended to be very busy, scrolling down websites on her computer and flipping thru files noisily. She realized at once, that she revealed more of her bad mood's cause than the intended and she knew for sure that Zoe would not leave her until she would finally speak.

Zoe watched her a while longer before she carefully asked: "How do you know, whom I was talking about?"

Cordelia let the file in her hand fall on the desk in a defeated gesture, leaned back and pinched the bridge of her nose. "Don't you have a lesson to teach?"

"In another thirty minutes, yes. That's why I want you to talk."

"It's…..private."

Zoe nodded. "I talk to you as a friend, not your employee, and, I'm sorry but if you act this way instead of doing your job I might as well draw your attention on that fact."

Cordelia lifted her hands in surrender. "As your boss I say thank you, you're right, I will not let my private issues get involved with my work. As a friend I say….it's private-private."

Zoe took a deep breath. "Don't you think that the other employee concerned it that private-private issue would like some chocolate bars, as well?"

Cordelia shook her head and looked away from Zoe and outside the window. "She won't eat anything in that mood. I mean …" She pushed the remaining bars back to Zoe, so the other woman could take them. "… try."

Zoe grabbed the chocolate bars and stood up.

"When this is over we should talk about my salary on this side job as a mediator." She said, took her bag from the chair behind her and left the headmistress' office.

Cordelia sat in silence. She did nothing but thinking. Zoe was right. She had to lead a school and a coven. There was no space for private issues. She felt sorry for her friend, who always tried to pour oil on troubled water. It happened to often recently. Cordelia knew that the fact that she as well as Misty were stubborn when it came to that topic of how to actually be together in a relationship. She wondered how they even managed it in the last nine months. Cordelia thought of the first two months of their relationship. In her memory they spent most of the time in bed. Making love, talking, snuggling, sometimes just looking at and adoring each other. It was heaven. Then the other day at work, when Cordelia sat at that same desk she asked Misty if they would see each other in the evening, the younger woman just sighed, looked at her and said:

_"__Don't be cross with me, but I wanna be alone tonight." _

_Cordelia felt her face turn red from the heat that was rising inside her. She acted cool. _

_"__Oh, okay." She had watched Misty reading her textbook for a while before she had to ask: "Have…you planned anything special for your night without me?"_

_Misty had shut her book and answered: "Let's not call it 'night without you' okay? I …" she had looked away in thought. " I might take a bath, read that novel I bought last week … things like that." She had opened her book again and began to read._

_"__Why d'ya wanna know?" she had asked Cordelia without looking up. _

_Cordelia shook her head and said: " I don't know. Maybe I'm just afraid there might be … someone else." _

_Then Misty shut her book and put it away for good. She had looked at Cordelia before she laughed. "Oh yes. I forgot to mention, that that guy will c'm' over 'n' we planned to do it all night long." She shook her head vehemently. "Stupid." _

_"__Do you realize that it's YOU who makes me feel that way?" Cordelia asked._

_"__Feel what? Jealous? I only told ya that I wanted t' be alone tonight. ALONE! No one else there but me. I want you to respect that." _

_After that Misty got up. She had walked over to Cordelia and kissed her._

_"__I'll call you before I go to bed, okay? Don't worry yourself." She had crouched down before Cordelia who sat in a chair and took her hand. _

_"__Are you going to be okay?" Misty asked in a soft voice. _

_And Cordelia just nodded. _

_"__Fine." Misty left and Cordelia sat in her chair close to tears._

_She was obviously not going to be okay._

The bell rang and brought Cordelia's thoughts back to the present time. She skimmed her desk, grabbed a pile of papers, put it into her bag and left her office.

OOOoooOOO

"You're not coming for lunch?"

Misty looked up to where the female voice was coming from and saw Zoe leaning against the door frame of her class room.

"Hey." She smiled at Zoe but then shook her head sadly.

"No thank you, but I'm not hungry." She kept on reading her student's essays.

Zoe approached her and sat down on the desk right before Misty's.

"I didn't see you in Cordelia's office today. What's up?"

Misty who just realized that she in fact didn't leave her classroom the whole morning, shook her head again. "I don't want to talk about it. It's private."

"Private-private?"

Misty gave the younger woman a confused look.

"Whatever." Zoe said and stood to walk around Misty's desk and lean against it. Misty shifted in her chair to create herself some comfortable space again. She waited a minute before she realized that the younger woman was not about to leave.

"I won't come with you. I got some work to do."

"You work at least. Cordelia is just pigging out herself with these." She put three chocolate bars on Misty's desk. Misty turned away with a disgusted look. "Would'ya please bring'em back t'er. I jus' can't eat anythin'!"

Zoe got up without taking the chocolate bars with her.

"Fine!" she said. "You know how Cordelia would adore the way you fall back into your drawl when you're mad, right?" She winked at Misty and left.

Misty smiled a little at the memory of Cordelia regularly getting turned on by her using her accent in certain occasions. She closed her eyes and shook her head slightly to shake off that thought. Her eye caught the chocolate bars left on the desk. She bit her bottom lip and suddenly her empty stomach made its presence felt. She thought for a while but decided that her pride was stronger than her hunger so she got up and walked out of the class room. Maybe some fresh air would do her good. After all she felt a bit dizzy for not eating since last night. She walked down the stairs and left the building where the sudden presence of fresh air had a quite opposite effect on her than expected. She leaned her back against a pillar and let her body slid downwards to a cowering position when her vision became blurry. She blinked once, twice and let her head rest against the cool brick behind her. She steadily felt better but decided to sit a while longer and close her eyes, just to be sure.

"You're okay?" Misty heard a very familiar voice calling her. She opened her eyes and saw Cordelia crouching in front of her. Misty slightly nodded but her vacant stare and her slowly shutting eyelids told otherwise. Cordelia sat next to her on the steps and took her hand, which was sweaty and cold.

"You're too tall to not eat. You know that, don't you?"

Misty nodded again.

"Can you do anything else but nod?"

Misty slowly shook her head. Cordelia bit her bottom lip to fight a chuckle.

"You know, I just came back from the supermarket and got some of those chocolate bars. Zoe took the last three away from me." She rummaged her bag and took out two bars, opened one of them and put it in Misty's hand.

"Eat!" she demanded.

Misty looked down on her hand and slowly almost apathetically took a bite. Cordelia watched her and nodded satisfied when she saw Misty's lips turn from purple to pink again.

The younger woman groaned relieved and became more agitated again. She stretched her legs and ate the rest of her chocolate bar with keen appetite.

"Why did you do this?" Misty asked and swallowed the last bite.

"Just because I'm mad at you, doesn't mean I don't care about you."

"Why are you mad at me?" Misty asked sweetly and took Cordelia's hand and entangled her own fingers with hers.

"Because I love you!" Cordelia looked at Misty and smiled at her.

"I love you too."

Misty shifted awkwardly. She nodded into the direction of Cordelia's bag.

"Can I have 'nother one?"


	3. Chapter 3

**Happy Easter Holidays to all of you! **

**Let me know what you think!**

Chapter 3: Overs

It was four days later on a Friday night. The house was quiet. Most students went to stay with their families. The ones remaining stayed in their rooms, already sleeping, watching movies on their laptops or reading. It was the night before Zoe Benson's birthday.

In that same house, in the biggest of all sleeping rooms, the supreme's room, Cordelia and Misty were making … well … love. They even did it the way both liked it most. One sitting on the others lap face to face, their legs wrapped around each other, bodies and hands moving in sync. But for some reason they just didn't have the same effect on each other as they once had. They reached a certain point at which both realized it wouldn't make any difference if they kept on or stopped right there. That was the moment when their eyes met. Both of them stopped in their motions, they slid out of each other. "I'm sorry." One of them would say and the other one would just shake her head slightly. There was a silent consensus about not talking about it.

They lay down beside each other. Cordelia snuggled up to Misty, using her chest as a pillow. Her fingertips met Misty's lazy playing with them. She looked at their hands, admiring every single inch of skin on Misty's hand with her eyes and soft touches of her fingertips. She felt the veins on the back of her hand. Cordelia always thought Misty's hands to look somehow strong but delicate at the same time. They were so neat although Cordelia knew that Misty never really put superior effort on manicure.

"What are you doing?" Misty quietly asked.

"Your hands are beautiful." Cordelia whispered.

Misty groaned quietly and shifted to lay her head more comfortable. She would never admit it to Cordelia, but somehow all these compliments made her feel uncomfortable in a way annoying even. She thought a while before she decided not to response. She felt a sudden tiredness subduing her body not only physical fatigue, she also was tired of all this, but she didn't want to think of it right now. Her hand went limp in Cordelia's. Her eyes fluttered shut.

"Misty, do you want to help me with those preparations for Zoe's birthday party tomorrow?"

Cordelia asked unaware of that Misty dozed off.

"Mh hm. Sure." Was the last thing Misty managed to hum.

Cordelia turned her body away from her and Misty immediately turned over onto her belly, her arms pushed under her pillow. Cordelia watched her sleep for a couple of minutes, before she herself closed her eyes.

oooOOOooo

They woke at about the same time. They looked at each other, eyes longing for something that was far gone, searching for a slight hint, a way out of this awkwardness but never finding what was once natural.

"We need to talk!" Cordelia said her voice shaking.

Misty nodded.

"I know you feel this heaviness upon us as well."

Misty nodded again. She felt tears burning in her eyes. Somehow it was a relief. Both of them knew that this moment was inevitable to come. They pretended for too long that it was not.

Cordelia bit her bottom lip to fight the lump in her throat. It was breaking her heart to see Misty like this, but she felt sorry for herself as well.

"We should take a break of each other for a while." She finally said her voice husky. And her words made it impossible for Misty to fight her tears any longer. She swallowed twice, cleared her throat and tried to speak.

"I…" Was all she could say, but her lungs were empty and aching from the vacuum. She just nodded instead, to confirm what the other woman just said. She felt her cold hand on her neck, making her look at her.

"Give us some time apart and then I'll come and get my woman back, okay?" Cordelia mustered up a smile

oooOOOooo

Misty stood next to Cordelia when Zoe blew out the candles on her cake just because she was used to it. Everyone in the room expected them to stand together so they decided to pretend being okay for this night at least. From time to time they even checked on each other asking a whispered "You're okay?", and okay they were, more than the night before. There was this moment when Cordelia came to Misty and said: "I give these two ladies a ride home, just so you know." Misty nodded towards her and got herself another glass of wine before she joined the party again, watching Zoe and some of her guests playing blind man's bluff. She smiled at the scene and leaned back against the wall.

"Hey, beautiful!" he greeted her.

Misty was obviously surprised but pleased to see him. They hugged.

"Hey yourself." She said. "I didn't know you were here."

"I just arrived." Jonas answered. "We had a gig in town, so…" he trailed off.

And there it was again, this allure between them. Misty felt her cheeks blush, the effect doubled by the alcohol she already consumed that night. She felt his stare on her as he stood beside her, their shoulders touching. They were silent for a couple of minutes, their arms between them close to each other but their hands never daring to touch.

"Don't you want to introduce me to your girlfriend?" he said and turned to stand in front of Misty and she just shook her head slightly.

"She's not here." She breathed and took his hand.

oooOOOooo

The door to one of the upstairs bathrooms closed behind them and Misty felt pressed against the wall by his solid body right after. His kiss was fierce and he smelled of a mixture of leather, smoke spearmint chewing gum and again that perfume. She was dizzy for the lack of oxygen his hot-blooded kiss caused. She gently pushed her hands against his chest, her lips leaving his. She felt his stubble grazing the skin of her cheek and neck and she liked it. She pushed his jacket off his shoulders and kicked off her boots at the same time. His strong hands were clutching at her breasts, causing Misty to moan into his neck. Their hands were shaking while their opened each other's belts and pants buttons. Misty felt Jonas' hot hands pushing her jeans down her thighs and after she kicked them off, she immediately wrapped her legs around his waist. His blue eyes checked on her matching ones. "You're okay?" he breathed and Misty nodded slightly before she was overwhelmed by the sensation of him entering her.

It was forceful and it was quick and when both of them climaxed after not more than two minutes later, Misty felt not satisfied in any way. She stood back on her legs, slowly letting go of his shoulders. When she opened her eyes again, he looked at her.

"I told you to stay in heaven. Why didn't you?"

ooOOOooo

Misty left the supreme's bathroom three hours later. She took a long shower as if she could wash away what happened, as if the hot water would have a magic effect on her, as if its heat could make it undone. She saw Cordelia sitting on the edge of the bed they were about to share for one last night. The older woman held the white blouse in her hand, which Misty had thrown on the sheets a couple of minutes ago. Cordelia smiled at her awkwardly. Misty walked around the bed. Sat down on it, so both women sat back to back. She put one some woolen socks and her pajama.

"You want me to have that washed for you?"

Misty didn't turn around when she shrugged. She needed a minute to realize that there was a slight quiver in Cordelia's voice. Misty heard her getting up from bed and her steps approaching her. She finally looked up, when the room became silent again. She saw Cordelia standing in the middle of the room, still holding her blouse in her hand. Misty stood up to be taller than the other woman. She caught sight of tears on Cordelia's face. The younger woman slightly shook her head and looked at the other one quizzically. Finally Cordelia spoke.

"How come that there's this … eau pour homme on your clothes?"

And that was the moment, Misty realized, that Cordelia_ touched_ the cloth, she knew what happened, as if she would have read her diary. A sudden heat rushed through Misty's body. She stood frozen with mouth agape.

"Answer me!" Cordelia yelled at her. Misty started at the unfamiliar volume of Cordelia's voice. Misty approached her, reaching out her arms to touch Cordelia's shoulders.

"No, Cordelia, please, jus' lemme explain!" But Cordelia backed out. She threw the piece of clothes towards Misty, who just let it slip on the floor. She tried it again, this time she was moving faster, but when she touched Cordelia's shoulders, the other woman's hand hit her face. Misty felt her right temple make contact to the floor and she knew immediately, that there would be a bruise. She got on her knees and watched a drop of red liquid falling on the floor. She tasted blood and licked her bottom lip, her tongue grazing the cut there. She wiped her mouth carefully and pressed her palm, covered by her sleeve on the wound to stop the bleeding. She looked up, her vision blurry, but she could see Cordelia crying and shaking her head. When she stood up she felt Cordelia's hands again hitting her chest and shoulders. Misty managed to grab Cordelia's hands after a few more attacks and forced her to look at her.

"Stop it!" She had to yell several times before she finally felt Cordelia's hands get limp in her grip. Cordelia fell down on her knees, bringing Misty with her. Both women burst into a flood of tears. They cried for what seemed an eternity before Cordelia tried to hit Misty again, full of anger, sadness, disappointment and…..love. But her hits were weak, so Misty easily managed to hold Cordelia's hands in hers. She looked at the older woman and licked her bleeding lip again tasting salt and blood. She shook her head.

"There's nothing I could say to make up for it." She whispered.

"Leave then!" Cordelia said and shook of her hands.

She remained kneeled on the floor and didn't look up, when Misty got dressed, grabbed her bag and left the room.

oooOOOooo

"Bywater, please!" Misty told the taxidriver and slumped down on the backseat. Her lip had stopped bleeding and she didn't dare to lick it again. She wasn't sure whether she should see a doctor or use her magic when she was at home but she was much too tired and worn out to do it right. She looked out of the car's window when she heard the taxi driver speak. He obviously looked at her through the rare view mirror.

"You should report this to the police, Lady!" he said gesturing towards his own bottom lip.

Misty chuckled quietly and looked down on her hands.

"Naah.. it was my own fault."

"That's what they all say, Lady." he said and turned around to look at his passenger.

Misty nodded quietly. She could as well play that game.

"So, you want me to…"

"Just…Bywater, please!" Misty said again, and the driver was silent for the rest of the ride.

When Misty paid the driver, he handed her a calling card together with her change and held her hand for longer than necessary.

"Get rid of him before it's too late, lady."

Misty looked down on the card.

"Anonymous victims of spousal abuse." It read.

Misty nodded and the taxi drove off. She thought of his words while she entered the apartment building. It was in quite another way, but yes, she should get rid of him, although it was already too late. She slowly walked up the stairs, fumbling for the keys in her bag and when she arrived at her apartment she unlocked the door, she was finally what she didn't want to be anymore.

Alone.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Go your own way

_Loving you isn't the right thing to do_

_How can I ever change things that I feel._

Cordelia heard the muffled lyrics thru the closed door to Misty's apartment. She was about to ring the bell, when she decided to listen until the refrain began. After Misty left last night Cordelia remained kneeled on the floor for at least half an hour. She was in a shock and she didn't like the fact that she on one hand was understandably angry, disappointed and in so many ways mad at Misty but on the other hand was sorry for hurting her, beating her and most important she wanted her to be there with her. She wanted her to help her calm down, soothe her, hold her in her arms. When Cordelia lay in her bed she thought that it was maybe her own mistake, that _she_ was the one who pushed Misty into doing this to her. Maybe she was constricting her freedom too much. When she finally had fallen asleep Cordelia dreamed of Misty. She was outside with her. She even smelled the odor of sweet flowers and felt the warm wind. She watched Misty whirling around, dancing on that sunny day her dreams created, humming, singing slumping down next to her on the grass, looking up the fair weather clouds above them and breathing in as if breathing in life. "I need this!" she said and then Cordelia woke.

_If I could maybe I'd give you my world_

_How can I when you won't take it from me_

Misty was busy cleaning her apartment, she danced thru the rooms, changing the sheets of her bed, dusting every surface. Maybe just because she wanted to distract herself from the nightmares she had last night that kept her from sleeping or her regretful thoughts or her anger and the pain on her chest and face. She began to sing the refrain of the Fleetwood Mac song that sounded loudly in her apartment.

"You can go your own way, go your own way, you can call it another lonely day."

She had to smile at the pun she just noticed for the first time. And then she almost suffered a heart attack when she heard the bell ring. She quickly turned the volume down before she ran to open the door.

Cordelia was shocked when she saw Misty's face. Glistening scab on the cut on her bottom lip, surrounded by swollen deep red skin, purple bruises on her temple, cheek and chin. She covered her mouth with her hand when she realized how much she'd hurt her. She would have sworn she saw a tiny little smile on Misty's face which lasted not longer than a split of a second and then her face turned serious.

"What do you want?" Misty asked her voice indifferent.

"May…" Cordelia had to clear her throat. "May I come in?"

Misty shifted pondering.

"As long as you're not beating the shit out of me again." She finally said and opened the door a bit more to let Cordelia pass.

"I am so sorry!" Cordelia said. "About ... " Cordelia gestured to her own temple. "…that."

Misty approached her. She didn't know what to say and the song was playing on in the background speaking for her.

_"__Tell me why everything turned around, packing up, shacking up is all you wanna do."_

Cordelia lifted her hand towards Misty's face which caused the younger woman to flinch. Cordelia shook her head slightly her eyes watery with tears.

Misty watched one tear rolling down Cordelia's cheek.

_"__If I could Baby I'd give you my world. Open up everything's waiting for you"_

"Please … " the tear reached the edge of her upper lip, and when Cordelia spoke it just disappeared between her lips. "Let me touch you!"

Misty nodded slightly. Cordelia's hand hovered close above the bruises on Misty's face. The younger woman could feel the heat radiating from the other woman's fingers. Finally Cordelia let her thumb rest on Misty's chin just below the cut on der lip. Misty closed her eyes. She wasn't sure whether she relished the touch or not. Maybe she was just relieved that Cordelia's touch was gentle again. It felt familiar.

"You didn't sleep." Cordelia noticed.

"It's angry." Misty said huskily and swallowed. She didn't like the fact that Cordelia could read her like a book just by touching her. Her eyes were still closed just to avoid Cordelia's sight.

"You should see a doctor. I think you need some antibiotic ointment." Cordelia didn't realize that she began to softly rub the skin on Misty's chin with the pad of her thumb until Misty shook her hand of with a movement of her head. She looked at her and just shook her head.

"What do you want?" She asked again.

Cordelia sat down at the dining table. "Talk." She simply said.

Misty leaned against the table her hands in the pockets of her pants.

"Have you been so desperate about our … relationship that you had yourself been taken by the next best…"

"No!" Misty groaned on frustration. " He ain't the next best and…I don't know how to justify what I did and … don't think I enjoyed it much, it wasn't that good at all."

"Do you expect me to pity you?" Cordelia asked which left Misty speechless. She looked at her mouth agape.

"You don't _want_ to get it, huh?"

"Do you regret it?" Cordelia asked some tiny tears rolling down her cheeks.

Misty was thinking for a while before she answered and the longer it took her to find the right words, the more uncomfortable Cordelia grew.

"I do regret that you had to see what happened … so very detailed certainly. I don't regret what I did. It wouldn't make a change anyway. It happened and I can't make it undone." Misty said, bit her bottom lip and forgot about her wound there. She flinched slightly.

"I don't know how to go on, how … you expect me to go on or if you even want us to go on." Cordelia quietly said.

"What I did …" Misty continued completely ignoring Cordelia's words. "…was just a single symptom of the disease our relationship suffers from."

A little smile tugged on the corners of Cordelia's lips. 'So there still is a relationship?' she thought to herself.

The song that played in the background faded out and there was a moment of silence in which both women just looked at each other. Cordelia got up and closed the distance between her and Misty. She almost trapped her between the table and herself. Misty straightened herself to gain some comfort which the lack of space has taken from her. She felt the heat that radiated from Cordelia's body on her rather cool skin and when she even felt Cordelia's lips grazing her own she was unable to fight to urge to touch her any longer. She pulled her even closer with her hands grabbing Cordelia's shirt roughly. It was as if the emotions that had built up in both of them were suddenly released to fight a battle of dominance. Fingernails were raking bare skin of arms and necks, teeth were biting lips and earlobes and whatever was in reach, strains of hair were pulled on roughly and there was a constant change of pulling close and pushing away each other.

"You know that I am really mad at you!" Cordelia whispered into Misty's ear. Misty shook her head slightly and pulled back to look at her.

They looked into each other's eyes before Cordelia leaned in again but Misty pushed her away.

"No!"

Cordelia felt Misty's hands strong on her chest. "What's wrong?" She asked her hands still clenched on the collar of Misty's shirt.

"Let's just not go there. It's confusing me enough already." Misty took Cordelia's hands in hers. Cordelia shook her head.

"You're right. You're right but I'm…" Cordelia looked down on their hands when she tried to find the right words.

"…I'm afraid you might….I want to make you…" "What?" Misty half whispered when she got a bit annoyed by Cordelia's spluttering.

"I'm afraid you might do it again, you know? You're mine!"

Misty smiled and touched Cordelia's cheek softly.

"You need to trust me." She breathed and realized how dumb that must sound after what happened. As expected she earned a smirk as response.

"Easier said than done." Cordelia said and mirrored Misty's touch on her face. She felt her skin wet and saw Misty's eyes watery.

"I am so, so sorry, Lia." Misty sobbed and immediately felt Cordelia's arms pulling her in a hug. She let her face rest against her shoulder, her hands embraced Cordelia's waist.

"I've been in that classroom again, last night." Cordelia heard Misty's muffled words.

"I know." Cordelia sighed and soothingly combed Misty's curls with her fingers.

"You said you would never let me go there again." Misty cried.

"I know." Cordelia said again and nuzzled her nose into Misty's hair to fight her own tears.

"But I think it was your own decision to leave our heaven."

Misty shook her head. "Heaven became too … poky."

"You're right. I kind of boxed you in. Maybe it's because of … you know, everyone whom I was fond of just left me or cheated on me or imposed on my love. They never deserved it."

"Hank?" Misty asked her tears slowly drying.

Cordelia nodded. "Him, my mother, Myrtle. But not you; you just unconditionally love me."

"I cheated on you." Misty quietly said and rubbed her cheek on the cloth of Cordelia's shirt to dry the remaining tears.

"But you love me, right?" Cordelia smiled.

Misty thought for a while.

"I don't expect you to understand what I want to tell you. I'm not sure if I do myself."

"Go ahead!" Cordelia said and backed out of their embrace but still held Misty's hands.

"Do you believe that it's possible to have relationship with somebody and … you're absolutely in love with that person at the significance of that relationship is about here…" She drew an invisible line into the air above her head with her finger.

"… and yet there's a person who just enthralls you. And you know that this doesn't mean anything, it's just sexual attraction and you would never put your relationship on a risk for that because it is about here." Misty drew another line into the air on the level of her shoulder.

"And then you just give in because you feel adored and everything's new and exciting and…"

"Why …" Cordelia interrupted her and again took her hands in hers. " did you do it?"

Misty slouched her shoulders and her whole appearance seemed defeated.

"Because it was nice…" Misty quietly said and knitted her brow unsure of how Cordelia would react.

Misty's answer hurt Cordelia more that she herself expected. She looked away in thought. Well, there was no answer which wouldn't hurt and she asked her, so what did she expect? At least Misty tried to explain, that it didn't mean anything. But on the other hand, if it didn't mean anything, why did she do it at all? And … did she say she felt sexual attracted to a man? Was she…?

Cordelia covered her nose and mouth with both of her hands and slowly breathed out through her nose before she looked at Misty again.

"Misty, have you ever thought about your…preferences?"

"What's there to think about? I _have_ some, yes." Misty had to chuckle. She knew where this would lead to.

"I mean … do you think, that sometimes … me … I mean me as a woman isn't enough?" Cordelia felt herself blush and for the first time she thought about herself. Was Misty enough? She never thought that there was something missing, but maybe _this_ was what all their problems were about. She decided to not speak it out loud.

Misty chew the inside of her cheek pushed her hands into her pockets and thought. She had to admit to herself, that she in fact didn't know. She liked being with Cordelia. It was awesome, wonderful, great but because of whatever it became boring in the last couple of weeks. And then there was Jonas and … well … no. It was definitely nothing Misty would miss. She tried, it was okay but she didn't want to try again.

"I don't know." She finally said. "I mean, I'm a blank paper when it comes to this. There's you and him and that's it. I really don't know."

"What do you like better?"

Misty had to smile. "That would be you, of course."

"Why?"

"Because… you know what I like and what I want and… we build up that magic and excitement, sometimes a whole day and when we finally do it everything's pleased. I feel satisfied, every … expectation is satisfied, physically and … emotionally and in fully the right way."

They smiled at each other before Misty continued.

"And Jonas … I know him since that night I've been out with Zoe last year. It was before we've been together and … yeah. He's a handsome guy and … we kind of flir…I don't want to hurt you, Delia."

Cordelia shook her head. "You just try to explain me, why I am the best. I don't see where that could hurt me."

Misty chuckled.

"Okay. Err…" Misty shifted and rubbed the sweaty palms of her hands on her jeans.

"There was this tension and allure between us right from the beginning. And I even forgot about him till last night and even when I saw him at the party I thought to myself, that it was long gone and that I'm over it. But I wasn't and neither was he. But nothing was right. It was too quick, too rough and I wasn't satisfied in any way. As I said, it was nice but it wasn't worth all that."

Cordelia couldn't help but grin satisfied. She approached Misty once again.

"I would like to take things slow so… May I ask you out for lunch, Miss Day?"

Misty took Cordelia's hands and rubbed their backs with her thumbs. She blushed.

"You mean as in a date?" She said and awkwardly looked at their hands between them.

"So you say."

Both women smiled at each other before Misty nodded and let go of Cordelia's hands.

"Let me get dressed, okay? I'll be with you in five … ten … okay fifteen."

Misty closed the bedroom door behind her. Cordelia smiled before her face turned serious again. She was not mad anymore yet she knew that they needed time. Both of them were hurt, Misty even physically. They needed to learn to trust each other again. One thing was sure though, their attraction towards each other was back. Maybe it was because of this rival. But all this wasn't really the reason why Cordelia was so pensive. It was because of what she saw, when Misty took her hands after Cordelia asked her out for lunch a couple of minutes ago. Should she tell her? Misty wouldn't even guess. But Misty would probably tell her in a couple of weeks; and then what? Should she pretend she hadn't known? Should she tell her she already knew? She decided to wait. Maybe nature would find a way before Misty even found out.

"Hey, what's bothering you?" Cordelia heard Misty's voice. She looked up and into her eyes.

"Um, nothing." She smiled at Misty and took her hand.

"I was just thinking about where I should take you… I mean …"

"I know what you mean, and I also know that you lie to me but that's okay I think."

Cordelia looked down ashamed.

"May I suggest some place? We can walk there from here, they do Cajun Kitchen." Misty closed her eyes. "Man, I have a jones for that right now." She added and pulled Cordelia behind her to the door.

"Do you really want to eat something that … hot?" Cordelia asked when they were walking down the stairs.

"I like it hot, you know that." Misty chuckled at the memory of Cordelia trying her Jambalaya for the first time and how she had to drink two big bottles of water afterwards to compensate the heat in her mouth.

'God help me if she wants to go there again and again for the next nine months…' Cordelia thought to herself.

"Did you say something?" Misty asked when she thought she heard Cordelia's voice.

"No, I didn't."

Cordelia advised herself to think more quietly from now on.


	5. Chapter 5

**I'd like to thank you all for your support and I'm sorry for the late update but I had some trouble to express what I wanted in a language that isn't my native. I did my best. **

**So enjoy.**

Chapter 5: Mick

It was three weeks later on a late Wednesday afternoon. The light already began to turn orange and some slight chill grew through the heated streets. There was a soft breeze. It was calm. Two women who actually belong together were as far from each other as they could. One of them sitting in her office typing on her computer to distract herself from the problems she should face. The other one strolling thru the streets of New Orleans towards Louis Armstrong Park. The fringes of the shawl that was wrapped around her shoulders flew in the softly blowing breeze the same way some strains of her blonde curly hair did. Somehow the city seemed abandoned like in a post apocalyptic scenario.

For Misty at least it seemed that way. No noise, no presence of any person stirred her senses. She was free of thoughts when she entered the park through a gate, not aware of three black and one white little paws following her. She sat down on a bench, lifted her face up towards the last rays of sun. She forced herself to think about what occupied her mind for a couple of days and what she suppressed so successfully. But she couldn't no longer because deep inside she knew that it wasn't the stress or her private circumstances speaking her relationship or not-relationship with Cordelia. There was a physical reason and it was the most natural thing in the world. Not only was she overdue, she felt the skin on her breasts getting more and more sensitive. The time to ignore it was over. The time to ponder whether she should find out or not was over. She knew it. She just needed it to be confirmed. Another question that bothered her was whether she should tell him or not. Actually she didn't want to see him again, didn't want to think of him again. She wanted to forget him but now he was about to occupy a place in her life, whether she wanted it or not because one question was already answered: The question whether she should keep it or not.

Cordelia leaned back in her chair. There was no work to be done anymore. Inevitably she had to think of the things she suppressed for so long. What occupied her thoughts wasn't the fact itself, it was more that she knew about it longer than Misty did. She didn't talk to her for a week. There was no reason to. They worked, they saw each other but the promise to take things slowly ended up in not taking them at all. They treated each other like strangers. A couple of times she thought about talking to her about what she knew but then she decided to not to. Not because she didn't want her to know, but because she knew that if she told her she revealed the fact that she had read her again. And she promised herself and Misty to not to. She stood up and walked towards the window. Standing there she wrapped her arms around herself and looked outside and wondered what Misty would be doing right now. Would she be at home, reading a novel, listening to some music or maybe cooking just for herself? Maybe she already knew, maybe she was wondering why she felt that strange. Cordelia found out that she did. She watched her when they saw each other in the hallways, when they saw each other while eating lunch and on occasions like this she realized that Misty was paler than usually.

She had to admit to herself that their relationship kind of calmed down. There was nothing to say, nothing to talk about, nothing to argue about, nothing to fight about, maybe even nothing at all. Cordelia thought to herself that just waiting wouldn't fix it. She had to fight for her relationship. She had to be there for her. She would care for her. She would even be the mother of her child if she wanted her to. Tomorrow she would talk to her.

oooOOOooo

Misty decided to talk to him. Tomorrow she would talk to him. Now she was distracted by some soft nudge on her naked ankle. At first it was cold and somehow wet, but then warm and … she had to think … furry. She looked down and had to smile at a cat which smooched around and between her legs. It was completely black with one white fore paw. She brought her hand down to touch it and felt its rough tongue licking her finger. The cat began to purr and Misty imitated the sound while ruffling the fur behind its ear.

"You like that, right? "

The cat let itself fall on the ground and rolled so its belly was up, inviting Misty to ruffle it there. It began to meow which actually sounded more like a "Mick"

"Mick?" Misty smiled. "That's your name? Like Mick Fleetwood?"

"Mieeeck" the cat 'responded' and purred even louder.

Misty grabbed the cat with both hands and lifted it onto her lap. It immediately began to milk treading on her thighs. It obviously felt comfortable.

"Just be careful with your claws, that's my favorite skirt!"

Misty watched the animal and her heart grew warmer. Mick finally curled up on her lap and blinked at her once, twice before he closed his eyes and doze off. Misty smirked and kept on going petting the animal while lifting her head up again, watching some fair weather clouds moving at the sky. The sound of the purring somehow eased her thoughts and she suddenly knew that everything would be okay ,no matter which decision she would make.

She sat another ten minutes before she felt cold. She straightened and wrapped her shawl tighter around her shoulders. The animal on her lap woke up and stretched its legs. Misty grabbed it and sat it down on the ground. Mick yawned, licked its snout and watched Misty attentively.

Misty expected the cat to run away as soon as she got up from the bench, because cats usually do run away when something 'huge' appeared. Misty crouched down and patted the cats head. "Now go home, Mick!"

And as if the animal understood what Misty said, it ran towards the gate abruptly.

Misty stood up again and sighed.

A thunder rumbled in some distance. Misty looked up and realized how dark the sky suddenly was. She should get home quickly.

oooOOOooo

Cordelia watched the sky growing darker and heard the first thunder rumble in some distance. "I hope you're home." She whispered, turned around, grabbed her note book from her desk and left her office. She walked straight to her bedroom. She didn't want to see anybody, not talk to anybody. She wanted to prepare for what was inevitably about to come. She put her note book on the small desk in her bedroom, flipped the screen open and switched it on. She sat down and while she waited for the computer to boot up she thought of the last time Misty and her actually talked and how Misty was able to hear what she thought. That was in fact the main reason why Cordelia kept her distance. As far as Cordelia knew, Misty could hear no one else's thoughts. Now Cordelia thought that maybe it wasn't Misty. Maybe it was the hormones that provoked some magical power she wasn't aware of until then. But, really? Hormones? That quickly? It wasn't a twenty four hours after...

_Bee Ding_

The sound of the note book alarming its readiness brought Cordelia back to reality. She took a deep breath, let her fingers hover over the keys before she started browsing random websites about pregnancy and motherhood. She knew them all by heart although it was longer than one year ago when she looked at them the last time. This time it was different. She didn't look at them as a mother-to-be, but as … the other parent. Hopefully. If Misty let would her.

Then the rain began.

Misty ran down the street towards her apartment building, her shawl wrapped around her head like a hood. The thin layer of cloth didn't keep the water from soaking her hair and skin, though. She saw someone entering the building and ran a bit faster to arrive at the building before the door fell close again. She managed it and ran up the stairs. Her lips and fingers shivered when she arrived at her floor she already saw it. It shook its head and some drops of water flew thru the air around it. Its fur was soaking and when Mick saw Misty he made a short purring noise and approached her to greet her.

He sat on the floor three feet before her. They scrutinized each other. Misty pondered a while and finally realized the little puddles beneath them.

"Okay, let's get ourselves dry and warm." she said and passed the cat which immediately followed her. She unlocked the door, entered her apartment and invited Mick to follow her with a movement of her head. She took of her wet clothes and put her bathrobe on. She turned the shower on the let the water run warm then rummaged around in the hamper find a big towel which ought to be washed. Her new companion always close beside her as if to watch over her.

"I think that'll do for now." She said and walked out of the bathroom and into her living room where she picked a big pillow from the couch and put in on the floor. She spread the towel over it and beckoned Mick to jump on it with her hand patting on the covered pillow. He jumped on it, found some comfortable position and immediately started to lick himself dry. Misty smiled at him before she turned around to switch on the gas of the chimney to lit it.

"Enjoy it. I'll be with you in fifteen minutes." Misty said and walked back into the bathroom to take a hot shower.

Micks gaze followed her as long as possible, then he began do purr to himself and lay down on the pillow hiding his fore paws beneath his body. He watched the flames and enjoyed the warmth that dried his fur.

"Are you hungry, Mick?" Misty asked when she returned from the bathroom not more that fifteen minutes later. It made the cat jump off the pillow and ran into her kitchen. He has not been in there before so Misty was wondering why he knew that food was there to be found. She looked puzzled onto the empty pillow and followed the cat that already paced the floor in front of her fridge impatiently.

"Miek!" he meowed.

"Yeah, miek … let me have a look. I hope you're not fussy, I think chicken breast fillet is all I could offer." she took it out of the fridge and looked at Mick who purred and licked his snout.

"Okay..." She said and prepared some unspiced roasted chicken breast for the cat and some Thai curry for herself.

After eating dinner both walked into the living room where they spent the rest of the evening, Misty reading, Mick watching the flames and grooming his fur. It was two hours later when Misty woke from a slumber by some nudging paws on her shoulder. Green shiny eyes met hers and she needed some seconds to remember that the cat was her new roomie.

"I got to get used to it, Mick!" She whispered and petted the cat which purred in response.

"Let's go to bed, okay?" Somehow she expected the cat to run into her bed room, but Mick didn't. He just waited for her to get up, watched her grabbing the towel from the pillow and then followed her into her bed room.

Misty spread the pillow over the bedside she didn't sleep on and Mick immediately jumped onto it.

"Just don't tell Cordelia I let you sleep in the bed, okay?" Misty took off her bathrobe and put her pajamas on before she switched off the lights and slid under the duvet.

"Good night, Mick!" she yawned and Mick purred in response when he felt Misty's hand touch his fur.

oooOOOooo

Cordelia's hand touched the pillow next to her, the one Misty's head used to rest on, the one Misty's tears fell on when Cordelia told her that she wanted a break from their relationship a couple of weeks ago. She could still smell her. Feel her. She haunted her dreams and Cordelia didn't know whether she liked it or not. She cursed her senses for tricking her mind. She wanted her back so badly and the urge to fight for her was never that strong before. And she would get her woman back.

It was in the early wednesday night. The last drops of a thunderstorm were falling from the trees' leaves. The air was cool, but slowly the the heat that was saved in the streets and pavement creeped onto the surface again. Two women who actually belonged together were as far from each other as they could … still.

**Reviews would be appreciated ...thank you!**


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